Foster parents David and Sasha decided to start fostering once their own children had flown the nest.
Over two years later, they are making an inspiring difference caring for four siblings. They share their exciting journey, the importance of keeping siblings together in foster care, and the real impact foster parents can have on a child’s life.
Our plan to foster
David and his wife Sasha had always planned to foster. For some foster parents, they choose to foster as a route to starting a family, some foster with children at home, and others wait until later in life – when they’ve retired or have an empty nest at home. There is no right time to foster, except when it feels right for you – and you feel you are ready to help make a difference to children’s lives.
David and Sasha shared their decision to foster and taking the first step:
“As a couple we always said one day when our own birth children reach adult life that we would look to foster. We initially enquired via our local authority but soon realised the support just wasn’t there. We heard about FCA after doing some deep diving online and the reviews we read were enough to help us make the initial enquiry.”
The couple are very passionate about fostering and their role in supporting children and young people.
“Having the ability to open our hearts and our home to children is a privilege to us. Being able to share a safe and secure environment and help shape a child’s future into something positive is one of the most rewarding things we can do at this point of our lives.”
The assessment process
To become a foster parent, families take part in a fostering assessment which involves a series of meetings with a social worker to discuss the fostering role and look at a family’s background and individual circumstances. The process ends with a panel meeting where a foster parent’s approval is finalised, and they are ready to start their exciting new journey.
David and Sasha enjoyed the fostering assessment process and have shared their experience of the process:
“We felt very welcomed by FCA from the first initial enquiry and very quickly we learned that we had picked the right IFA for us. Some people can find the process intrusive, but we actually really enjoyed it. We were open and honest about all aspects of our lives and so, when we were deep diving into our past, it was almost therapeutic as we talked about our own childhoods and reflected on areas that we hadn’t even realised shaped the people we are today.”
The couple also shared their experience of the initial Prepare to Foster training at FCA:
“For us meeting ‘real foster parents’ during the training was the most significant as hearing experiences from real carers is so different to reading in text or watching a video, it’s very powerful and encouraged us even more that we were doing something that could change children’s lives.”
Caring for four siblings
Due to a severe shortage of foster families – and, in particular, those able to offer a home to more than one child – it is estimated that one in three children in care are separated from their brothers or sisters.
David and Sasha are very passionate about keeping siblings together in foster care, wherever it is possible, and welcomed four children into their family to ensure they could stay together.
“When we first passed panel, we were approved for up to 2 siblings, but we found ourselves initially with a sibling group of 3 who after a while became 4 due to a breakdown of a placement elsewhere.”
“Keeping these children together has been so important. The fact they are safe together gives them a feeling of familiarity which in turn gives them an added layer of security. Going into care is can be frightening, and if children can face this new scary chapter with a sibling by their side it can give them a lot of reassurance that they aren’t doing things alone.”
Life changing impact
Foster parents make such an incredible difference in the lives of children every day. For David and Sasha, the everyday family life they provide to their children is truly transformational. They said:
“Life is so busy, it can sometimes feel mad and chaotic, but our daily routines and boundaries always remain no matter what life throws at us in any given day. These rules and routines have given the children a strong sense of safety and stability and they have all flourished with the secure environment that surrounds their daily lives. We always say to other families to never underestimate how powerful daily routines are, we take them for granted but they are the foundation/starting blocks for children who have experienced trauma.”
“Other foster carers used to say to us, ‘are you mad having 4?!’ and now they say how lucky we are because the children are so happy and content. That’s all come from opening our hearts, our home and being consistent in everything we do, the children now feel safe, secure, loved and we encourage them all to be the best version of themselves.”
The couple shared one of the moments where they realised they’d made a real difference in their foster children’s lives:
“We feel like we’re making a difference to our children almost daily to be honest. Every day is a new adventure with a new milestone. One of our placed children went from being a year behind the peers in her class to getting one of the highest SATS scores in her school within 12 months. There was no additional out of school tuition or anything like that, just a stable loving home and giving her the tools to help her reach her full potential. The children surprise us every day with how far they’ve come.”
“Thinking about the children who arrived with us, compared with the children we see before us today, can often bring a tear of joy and happiness.”
Support at FCA
When you foster a child, the support you receive from your fostering agency is crucial. David shared his experience of the support they have received.
“The support from FCA has been brilliant, we definitely feel part of a strong community, and the monthly support groups are an excellent way to spend a morning chatting to other carers and sharing experiences and knowledge. Our SSW is fantastic; she genuinely cares about our family unit and visits regularly. She is a great support and helps us advocate for the children in various areas of their lives.”
“One thing we didn’t realise about fostering is just what a great community of people you meet, people who open their home to others who need them.”
The couple have also benefitted from the extensive training and therapeutic courses provided at FCA.
“We have a huge amount of training available to us, both online and in person, and it’s really varied. Children are all unique and individual but there seems to be a training module for almost everything you can imagine, and it really helps you understand what the children are experiencing and gives us the tools to offer them the best support.”
Our advice
When David and Sasha began fostering in 2024, they knew they’d made the right decision and haven’t looked back.
“One thing we did differently to others is for the first 6 months we offered respite cover and support to other carers and this opened our eyes to lots of different children. In fact, it was taking care of a sibling group for a week that cemented our decision to focus on keeping a sibling group together and we haven’t looked back since.”
“Fostering has been one of the most rewarding experiences of our lives. If you want to make a positive change to a child’s life, there is no greater calling than to be a foster carer.”
You don’t need experience to become a foster parent, just a passion for caring for children and wanting to make a difference.
If you’d like to learn more about fostering, we’d love to hear from you. Call us today on 0800 023 4561 or complete our enquiry form and our team will be happy to share more information.
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