Fostering Siblings: Why Keeping Families Together Matters

When children first enter care, their bonds with their siblings may be the only trusting and loving relationships they’ve experienced so far in their young lives. Let’s take a look at why it’s important to prioritise family time for siblings in care.

Siblings

Why are siblings separated? 

Imagine: you’re sitting in the back of a stranger’s car, having been taken away from your home and your family. You’re being driven to a whole new life which you have no say in— new foster parents, a new house, maybe even a new school. You’ve been told that your siblings are staying together, which brings you some comfort, but when you ask where they are or when you’ll be able to see them again, no one seems to have any clear answers. 

Scenarios like this are the sad reality for many children up and down the UK. Siblings who are taken into care are separated for a range of reasons, including: 

  • Younger children in the family being placed for adoption. 
  • In rare cases, if the relationship between the siblings was very difficult, such as if violence was involved.
  • A limited number of foster parents who can provide homes for more than one child at a time— that’s why here at FCA we’re encouraging more people with the space in their homes and in their hearts to consider fostering sibling groups. 

While it is not always in children’s best interests to live together in the same foster home, for most children living with a sibling can be hugely beneficial. Let’s learn more about what makes sibling relationships so important for children in foster care. 

The impact of sibling separation  

Studies show that around 40% of children in foster homes will face sibling separation, a number which is much higher for children in other forms of care such as supported accommodation or shared children’s homes.  

The importance of sibling relationships is perhaps best laid out by the Children’s Commissioner Report into siblings in care, which says: 

‘These relationships can provide the ‘protective effect’ of family… they are often the most loving and important in children’s lives, and can be a source of strength, stability and support throughout the challenges and insecurity they have faced. Being separated from their siblings when placed in care [can have] lifelong repercussions, damaging those relationships in ways that could sometimes never be repaired.’  

When siblings are unable to live together in the same foster home, they may go from seeing each other every day to as little as once or twice per year. While siblings cannot always stay together, having a foster parent who understands the benefits of keeping in good contact with siblings can make all the difference, and children can still benefit from the protective factors associated with sibling bonds even if they cannot live in the same foster home. 

Key benefits of sustaining family bonds  

There is a huge range of benefits which come when foster parents work hard to sustain sibling bonds. These benefits include: 

  1. Emotional connection. Many children who are separated from their families have to forge entirely new relationships from scratch when they enter the care system, on top of dealing with the trauma of separation and any trauma caused by the experiences which led to them entering care in the first place. Having a loved one by their side provides emotional support and someone to lean on.  
  2. Shared experiences. Many children in foster care can struggle to find a sense of belonging. Being with a sibling during a time when everything seems to be changing rapidly can help them to keep a hold of their sense of identity. Having someone by their side who they feel can relate to their experiences can also make the big transitions associated with foster care easier. 
  3. Lifelong connections. Sibling bonds often outlast many of our other relationships, including those with our parents. Disruption to these relationships while children are growing up can cause lasting damage. If a sibling bond is not properly cared for it may begin to wilt and eventually wither, making it much harder for siblings to reconnect in adulthood. By taking the steps to nurture sibling relationships through visits, phone calls or living together, foster parents can help children to maintain lifelong, treasured bonds.   
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Change a child’s life today 

With the help of loving foster parent who understands the need to nurture and protect sibling bonds, the unconditional love shared between siblings can last a lifetime. Are you ready to support siblings in foster care, or could you welcome a child into you home? Contact us today here at FCA to learn more about how you can become the positive change in a child’s life.  

Siblings

Am I Ready to Welcome Another Foster Child?

Common concerns about fostering two children or more 

If you’ve reached a stage where you feel ready to welcome another child into your home, it’s important to reflect on your fostering journey so far and consider the impact it could have on you, the child in your care, and any other family members living in your home. Below, we consider the questions you may be asking yourself, and offer guidance to help you make a well thought out decision.

fostering two children or more

How will it impact the child already in my care? 

Before committing to welcoming another child into your home, you need to consider the impact it could have on the child already in your care, as they are currently your main priority. Much will depend on the individual needs and experiences of the child. Some children thrive when they have siblings, whereas others may find the change more destabilising and difficult.  

It’s about knowing the child already in your care and considering how they may feel about the change. The best way to find out is by having an honest and open conversation with them about the possibility of a new addition. If they do have any worries, listen and validate their feelings, while reassuring them that your love and care for them will not change.   

For example, if you’ve built a strong bond with the child in your care, they may be worried about how a new foster sibling could affect your relationship with them. It’s essential to remember that children who’ve moved into care have often been let down by trusted adults, making it difficult for them to let their guard down in the first place. The idea of then having to share you with someone else may feel quite scary for them. So offer support and think about how you’ll ensure the child you’re already caring for still feels safe, stable, and loved when welcoming a new foster sibling.  

Can I afford to foster another child? 

It’s natural to be concerned about the cost implications of fostering more than one child. However, when you foster with us at FCA, we ensure that your fostering pay not only covers the essential costs of caring for each child but also rewards you for your hard work and dedication.  

You’ll receive a generous fostering allowance for each child in your care, which currently averages £487 per week per child. Not only that, but due to qualifying care relief, fostering allowances are typically tax-free, leaving you with more in your pocket to spend on building memories with your family. We also offer additional bonuses, and every foster parent at FCA benefits from our STARS scheme, designed to recognise and reward you for transforming young lives.  

Another Foster Child

Is my home big enough for another child? 

Another important thing to think about when considering fostering two children or more is whether you have enough room in your home. We’re often asked, ‘Can a foster child share a room with another child?’ In most cases, the answer is no – every child you foster needs a room to call their own, and here’s why.  

Imagine being a child or young person who has just left everything you know to move in with a new family. You may feel scared, lonely, and confused as you try to process your circumstances and painful memories that have left you living with trauma. 

When you arrive, all you want to do is curl up in a ball on your bed, but you’re sharing a room with another child, making it difficult to relax and feel safe enough to do so. Every time you feel overwhelmed, you have nowhere to retreat to for some time alone and can’t make the space your own because you’re sharing it. 

Children and young people living in care need a space to call their own – somewhere they can surround themselves with things that bring them comfort and retreat if they feel overwhelmed. If you’re fostering siblings who have previously shared a room, it may be in their best interest to share again because it provides familiarity and reassurance. However, when fostering children from different families, you must have a spare bedroom for each child.  

How will I balance my time between each child? 

Regardless of the type of fostering you already do, welcoming a new child into your home will change your family dynamics. Every child is unique, and as they grow, they’ll go through various transitions that may mean they need a little more of your time and attention than the other child you foster. For example, if one of the children you foster experiences bullying at school, they may need more of your attention as you help them navigate the issue.  

However, while you may need to focus on one child a little more at times, you can still take steps to ensure each child receives the time and attention they need. A great way to do this is by including daily moments of individual attention for each child in your routine, such as reading them a bedtime story if they’re young or watching a TV show together if they’re older. This will help strengthen your bond with each child and ensure everyone feels part of the family.  

At FCA, we’ll work with you to make sure the transition from one foster child to two or more doesn’t negatively impact your current family dynamics. Our Team Parenting model ensures the well-being of every child is nurtured and provides a community you can lean on during the transition. 

How will I meet everyone’s needs, including my own? 

If you’re worried about managing everyone’s needs when welcoming another child – including your own – don’t worry. When you foster with FCA, you’re never raising a child alone. 

We are committed to providing therapeutic foster care that supports every aspect of a child’s well-being while always ensuring foster parents feel equipped and confident to meet their changing needs. From our therapy services, which help you develop new ways of responding to each child’s needs, to education support that ensures every child gets the most out of school, we’re by your side every step of the way.  

Our year-round activities, events, and support groups help you stay connected with other foster parents, giving you more people to lean on as your family grows. So, if you want to know what it’s really like to welcome another child into your home, talk to your foster parent friends – they may offer valuable insights and advice to help you navigate this step on your fostering journey.  

  

Get in touch today 

If you’re already fostering and are thinking about welcoming another child into your home, reach out to your local team – they’ll be happy to offer further guidance as you consider this next step. If you’re new to fostering and want to learn more about fostering a child, please get in touch. Our friendly team is ready to support you and answer any questions you may have.

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